Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
