Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
