Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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