is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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