PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
