come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
