New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
