I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
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