You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
He felt like a one man threesome
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
