i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
You are the jesus of drinking
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
