I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
