i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
