Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Vodka?
Forever.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Randomize
