i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
