We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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