I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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