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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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