My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Randomize
