Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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