You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
