So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Randomize