paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
