The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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