I want to make a zoo with you.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
Randomize
