Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
