Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Randomize
