I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
well you can't waste a boner
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I was not drunk enough for that final.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
