"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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