normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
