his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize