Non-Jews are for practice
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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