You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
