Yo dont text me then not text me
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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