tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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