i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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