Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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