so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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