That's intense
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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