Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
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