I cockslap morals
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
His hands were made for my vagina.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
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