your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Randomize
