boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
