Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Randomize
