I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
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