Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
