i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
its liver damage thursday
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
