Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
