therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
