and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
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