Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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