I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
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